Thursday, December 17, 2009

Operation: Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

It seems that Tiger Woods is ducking media coverage in an attempt to get his affairs in order, or is that order more affairs, I forget. Anyways, while the rest of the world anxiously awaits the next events in the PGA champ turned living soap opera that is the Tiger, I've been watching the Dragon. Dragon, of course, being the magical serpent that is Obama. Seems he's a-headin' to Copenhagen. Probably not a bad move after sending 30,000 troops to Afghanistan. "I'll just hide over here and let Tiger's infidelity take the limelight, no one cares about climate issues to pay attention to me here." A search on Yahoo News for "Obama" has nothing but climate-related issues for about two pages. Won't be long before everyone forgets that Mister "Let's end the war" has just ramped things up. I don't know if I'm more upset that people have practically forgotten how the two-headed dragon promised an end to these wars or that he has the audacity to send more troops over there.

Why do we feel the need to prop up every nation we have fought with over the years? It's not like they are ever going to like us. We're certainly not going to break even by creating some kind of lucrative trade agreement where we make back more than we spent on war budgeting. I think the whole reason we're still there is because we can't figure out a way to leave that doesn't have us looking like cowards that ran from the fight. So what! Since there's going to be 30,000 more troops there now, lets just do a big offensive, and then just withdraw overnight. Vanish like a fart in the wind. We'll leave them a note that says "Sorry we didn't stick around to play but the truth is we got bored here. You guys might like sex with goats and all that, but we're going home to have a beer, have sex with our wives, and watch online porn and cartoons of foul-mouthed kids from Colorado. We do crap like that because we're free and that's why freedom rules. Enjoy your goats, Afghanistan. -Love, USA"

Next time some nation wants to screw with us, lets just drop an A-bomb. August 6th, 1945 we bombed Hiroshima and then Nagasaki three days later. Six days afterwards, Japan announced it was surrendering. That's like fight on Monday, home by Friday kind of warfare. That should be our war policy from now on. Drop two bombs and let them call us in the morning. Don't think I'm a warmonger for thinking like this. I'm quite the opposite. We should just be the quiet guy in high school that no bully wants to fight because everyone saw him lay someone out with a fierce punch.

1 comment:

  1. I like the notion of ending wars quickly. We have the technology to make that reality. Unfortunately,those multi-billion dollar transnational corporations(Halliburton, Raytheon, etc. . .) that profit from conflict wouldn't be able to fill their coffers for decades. As with the climate issue, conflict is all about the MONEY.

    Obsequious (ob-si-kwi-us)
    From Latin obsequium (‘compliance’)
    1. (archaic) Obedient, compliant with someone else's orders or wishes
    2. Excessively eager to please or to obey all instructions; fawning, subservient
    . . .See also 'American Public'